Christmas is closer than you think...

The last month has flown by, but I haven't had any studio time.  And now Christmas is sneaking up on me!
In my defense, in the last month I have spent two weeks in Maryland, working on Bruce's house getting it ready to sell, and one week in New Jersey, visiting Pop, attending a memorial service for Bruce, and visiting with old friends and cousins.
Brian and Pop
Grief is a funny thing.  In college, I took a class based on Elizabeth Kubler Ross' book On Death and Dying.  At the age of 19, death was certainly an abstract concept, and I found it academically interesting, but of course not personally applicable.  At 19, Brian (who was then my boyfriend, now my husband) and I were going to live forever.  My parents, although I thought of them as "old" (they were in their forties -- ancient!) were going to be with me forever.  But of course that is not true.  Loss is inevitable and is a part of life.  It is funny, though, as I lose each loved person, I find that I really do go through the stages of grief outlined by Kubler Ross.  Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.  Not necessarily in a linear progression, but I have experienced all of them.  And although acceptance does finally arrive, sadness occaisionally comes creeping back.

I am ready to move into acceptance.  I think I'm almost there.  I didn't think I would be interested in celebrating Christmas this year, but much to my surprise I find that I am.  It's time to dig out a few decorations, write a few Christmas cards, wrap a few presents and shop for a few stocking stuffers.  And time to cherish those I love.  

Season greetings!


Maria Shell said…
This is lovely post Heather. I hope you have a wonderful holiday season! I finished my shopping yesterday. All is well in Alaska except for the sheet of ice that is our drive way!
Louise said…
I hope you find peace and comfort in the familiar rituals at Christmas this year, Heather.